Think about a recent conversation you had with your teenager - especially if the topic was a difficult one to broach or one with a history of tension or conflict. Did it feel tough to “get through” to your teen? Or perhaps the attempt to check in lead to an explosive fight, after which you find yourself seething and thinking (or, let’s face it, yelling) “how dare you talk to me that way!” Everyone has a different approach, or primary style, to navigating communication and conflict. Which one is your teen’s go-to?

Let’s be honest. Being a teenager right now is hard. You’re coming of age during a time of intense political threat, global challenges, and constant social pressure. The world feels like it’s spinning faster than ever, and somehow, you’re supposed to figure out who you are in the middle of the chaos.

As our children shift into preteen and teen years, simple things like completing chores, doing tasks that they always did before sometimes become more difficult. You ask them to do something and you get a big fat NO. Oh god, and it’s so frustrating. Any parent can agree I think. 

As a parent, watching your teenager go through a breakup can be heart-wrenching. You want to help, but it’s not clear how to best reach them. It’s important to understand that adolescence is a time of intense emotions which is why a first breakup can feel like the end of the world. Parents play a crucial role in helping teens navigate this challenging time. So, what can you do?

Are you a parent who struggles to talk or with your teen? If the answer is yes I’m sure you won’t be shocked that you are not alone!  Sometimes it can feel like teenagers speak an entirely different language.  The teenage years can be so complicated, so many ups and downs, so much misunderstanding!  And in times of distress as a parent it is normal to want to have control, to experience anxiety for your child’s future and to focus on all the “ you shoulds” and “you need to”.  But when we focus so hard on who we want our teenager to be and what we believe they should do we miss out on their own authentic evolution and this often exacerbates self doubt and can even push them further away. 

It feels like just yesterday summer kicked off to a raucous start and now for families with teens summer is coming closer to winding down. And with the close of summer on the horizon, I would encourage you to start planting seeds with your teens about the return to school, especially if they had a difficult time last year or tend to struggle in school historically. Reflection is a key part of developing mindful awareness, and doing so will not only support your teen in navigating potential pitfalls more effectively but help designate you as someone they can come to if and when they need support. There are a few key factors to keep in mind when attempting this.

As a therapist who works with teens, a constant experience I hear from parents is the struggle to truly connect with them. The adolescent years can be a complex time for both teens and parents as teens are navigating a newfound desire for independence. This experience can leave the parent-child relationship feeling strained and distant. However, fostering a strong bond and quality time can provide benefits for a teen’s overall well-being.

If your teen is in therapy for the first time, you might wonder what’s going on during those first few sessions, and your teen might be wondering what to expect when talking to a therapist for the first time. It makes sense to be curious or even nervous for this new experience. Building rapport is an important part of therapy, and especially important when working with teens. Making a true connection with someone is a vital first step towards effective therapy. Everyone is different, but it usually takes a few sessions to start to build a sense of trust and comfort with a new therapist. This is especially true for teens, who might be apprehensive about attending therapy to begin with. Here are some things to keep in mind if you’re a teen or a parent of a teen who has questions about what those first few sessions might look like: