Are you a parent who struggles to talk or with your teen? If the answer is yes I’m sure you won’t be shocked that you are not alone! Sometimes it can feel like teenagers speak an entirely different language. The teenage years can be so complicated, so many ups and downs, so much misunderstanding! And in times of distress as a parent it is normal to want to have control, to experience anxiety for your child’s future and to focus on all the “ you shoulds” and “you need to”. But when we focus so hard on who we want our teenager to be and what we believe they should do we miss out on their own authentic evolution and this often exacerbates self doubt and can even push them further away.
Read More
Dear parents,
Here are answers to more frequently asked questions that often pop up for parents searching for services for their child/teen. I hope these insights can help you as you begin sussing out what you are looking for therapeutically.
Read More
We all experience grief at different points in our lives and in various layers and complexities. When a loved one dies, there’s the obvious gut-wrenching grief that can feel all-consuming. If we move away, there’s the loss of proximity to friends and the community we’ve built plus the loss of the familiar - our home, routines, places we frequent - that can all bring grief, even if it arrives in conjunction with excitement and hope for the future. We also feel grief when relationships end, whether it’s a friendship that comes to a close or a break-up of a romantic relationship, all those same waves of denial, sadness, anger, bargaining, and acceptance may come up again and again as we adjust to how life is different and what we miss about that relationship.
Read More
There are many factors to consider when thinking about teen substance use, such as which substances are being used, the environment in which they are used, frequency, and possibly most importantly, the reason they are being used. All of these factors are interrelated and thus must be considered together when trying to understand substance use. For the purposes of this blog however, the focus will be on understanding why teens may use substances and how this impacts development.
Read More
Throughout my time in this field, more specifically through my work with teens over the years, I have come to notice the most cyclical struggle that continues to emerge as time goes on is lack of confidence. I tend to see a lot of over-caring what people think in conjunction with wanting to impress others. That being said, I thought I’d take this time to first share what I think are contributing factors to this (sometimes lifelong) dilemma, as well as some tips and tricks on what I feel have been most useful in getting teens out of that funk.
Read More
Have you noticed that your teen has been struggling with their busy schedule? Have you observed your teen feeling overwhelmed and frustrated because they have a lot on their plate? Have you recognized that your teen is neglecting their daily needs in order to keep up with their busy lives? Teaching our teens how to balance a busy schedule while prioritizing their needs can help lead our teens to become successful and healthy individuals.
Read More
As a therapist, I am frequently asked by parents if what their teen is going through is normal or if they should be concerned. To be fair, coming to therapy for typical teenage changes is common and very helpful even if it is in the realm of normal. The safe space of the therapy office gives adolescents room to sort through their thoughts and feelings in a way that is not replicable with parents or friends. Having said that, there are times when concerns arise and it is important to have parents more involved. Typically what we look at is danger and impairment. The following major areas come to mind that we will look at more in depth: suicide and self harm, substance use and behavioral issues.
Read More
Let’s be honest, navigating life as a teenager isn’t easy. Trying to figure out what makes you unique, while also finding a community you feel you belong to, is a heavy burden most of us face at some point in our lives. Our society mirrors and is modeled after the concept of human “doers''. If you’re wondering what that means, well let me try to break that down for you.
Read More
Today I want to introduce one of my favorite topics in therapy. It can often explain so much of our teen’s (and our own) experience, but we don’t always think about it in a broader context. That topic is grief and loss, and not just related to death.
Read More
With the pandemic continuing for almost a year now, I felt it was a good time to talk about a common topic for parents struggling with teens in isolation. Adolescents often crave peer relationships, and that can be tough to manage when we are all expected to stay at home. In this article, I will discuss the benefits of increasing your teen’s time with friends, as well as some options that have worked for other families who are facing this same struggle. However, keep in mind what unique challenges your family may need to balance when deciding how to best address this important issue.
Read More
The teenage years can be a roller coaster for teens and parents alike. The surge of hormones and changes in body chemistry can cause teens’ moods to fluctuate from calm to sad to irate in a matter of minutes, which can leave everyone--your teen included--feeling overwhelmed and baffled. Add these ups and downs to the impulsivity teens have and their lack of life experience, and sometimes it can make for a scary combination.
Read More
Imagine this scenario:
You notice something is off. Every time you ask your teen daughter how she is doing, she just says, “I’m fine.” It’s frustrating because you know there’s more going on than “just fine” because you are feeling it. You’ve felt the shift in her behavior and mood for a while now. Maybe you’ve even asked Dr. Google late at night, putting in her behaviors and words— searching desperately for answers to that nagging in your gut that something is wrong.
Read More